Winter Report

Blogging is fast becoming a vacation-only pursuit. Frankly, I'm impressed with myself for doing the minimum requirements of all the responsibilities I've taken on this year, so I can only feel a shade of regret (but absolutely zero guilt). I'm teaching full time (something I once thought impossible to do along with having kids) and I'm leading Adele's Daisy Troop and I'm teaching children's chapel at church. I've stepped back a bit from choir- a person can only do so much. They've been working on an extra-curricular concert (Rutter's Requiem Mass with the Presbyterians) and that's where I hit my limit. No is the hardest on-syllable word for me to say, apparently, but I said it.

 

Meanwhile, Miles has taken on a new responsibility: He's an acolyte at church, pretty much every week now. 

                                                             Adele continues to accumulate reading and writing skills rapidly. She might be learning faster than Miles did at this age! She's taken on learning cursive, multiplication, and has been picking up big chapter books to read.  

                                                              Adele's also begun Daisy Girl Scouts! This pic is from the cookie rally we attended, as week before our (very successful) first Daisy Meeting. We're saying the pledge, selling cookies, singing "Make New Friends" and I'm researching ways to earn badges. I find if I do what I can on weekends and take it one week at a time, I can avoid the overwhelm I usually experience when Trying to Do Things While Teaching.

We celebrated Robert's birthday party! Miles and Robert continue to be inseparable and it's adorable and also my heart hurts every time I remember that someday, we'll probably move from Pueblo. I don't know why I borrow trouble.

There has been VERY LITTLE SNOW this winter. It's probably the most disappointing winter we've had. Probably three times we had snow, once with about four inches, every other time a couple of inches or less. Pitiful! I bought them snowpants and boot and everything this year, and apparently, to no avail. March IS coming, though, and as Jon says, Colorado is always one March snowstorm away from drought. Last time we had snow, Jon found this little nugget in the street. Miles (who is nearly finished with The Goblet of Fire) is pretty sure it had a message for him.

We continue to exercise dogs and kids at Belmont in the evenings. This place is so dear. Adele is ready for a 20" bike; she's amazingly steady.

Late in January we attended the one-year anniversary Women's March- right here in Pueblo! About 1000 people came, which is excellent for Pueblo (that's like 1% of the whole city!). I saw a bunch of people I knew, from church and work and from around town, which makes this year's event much different from last year's.

I loved all the chicana and indigenous women's groups we saw. All in all, an inspiring and hopeful day.
                                                                 I'm pretty pleased with myself for all that I'm doing, as it's all worthy stuff. I don't particularly want to be a girl scout leader, if you want to know, at this point in my life. But darnit, if my daughter wants to be a girl scout and if I have to lead in order for that to happen, I'm doing to be the best Daisy Troop Leader I can possibly be.

Teaching is better. I've had a bit of a management breakthrough. I'm also helped by the knowledge that the whole sixth grade team is struggling with this group, which is large and has a LOT of unruly members. And I'm really enjoying planning lessons to accompany The Watsons Go To Birmingham- 1963, and grammar lessons, and Civil Rights and Persuasive Writing lessons. And look at us! We're more than halfway through the school year!The days are getting longer and warmer, so I'm back in my running shoes. Well, my new running shoes. I have reached an all-time weight high! That's what you get when you replace running with grading. But I'm back on the trail, and Koopa approves.
My church surprised me by actually acknowledging the news last week! I wish this had ever happened for any of the white supremacist rallies or officer-involved shootings in the news, but it's a start. They read all the names of the teens who were killed in Parkland last week, and we spent time praying aloud for the families and survivors. My own prayer that I add to these is that the survivors' efforts to wake our country up and get some changes made to challenge our deadly gun-worship are successful beyond their imaginings.
                                 I've JUST finished teaching my ELA classes about The Children's March in 1963, and how children changed the world by walking out of their classrooms one day. If they walk out for any of the scheduled protest days in March or April this year, I will not get in their way.

I hope you enjoyed what will probably be my only winter update! But don't worry; spring break is coming in a month!

Epiphanies

Koopa and I play during our St. Stephen's Day 1/2 inch of snow.

                   


          Did I mention that it's incredibly hard to blog while school is in session? Like, so hard that blogging is only one of a long list of things that get shoved aside to do during holidays and breaks.. Also on that list is "have fun and quality time with family" and that mission was thoroughly accomplished during the break, despite that we didn't leave the state.

We hit up the Pueblo Zoo over break, on a day that the temperature was in the 60s and the sun shone out bravely.

Check out the lion cubs!! The Pueblo Zoo recently welcomed lion triplets! They were hilarious to watch, especially as their mom because increasingly frustrated trying to round them all up. She ended up transporting them one at a time by mouth, only to find that the other two had dispersed again!

Something that you need to know about our family if you're going to be current with our doings is that Robert has become an informal part of our family. This is partly because he lives down the street and is Miles' VERY BEST FRIEND. And, it is partly because his family, whom we love, has been struggling. His dad has some serious health problems, so we often are happy to have Robert come be with us if it helps his Mom go to work, or take care of his dad. So Robert was a part of a lot of our winter break and is a regular feature in our weekends. Sometimes Adele gets a little third-wheel-itus! But most of the time, they're successful at including baby sister in their games.

The next day, the temperature soared into the 70s! So we hit up Lake Pueblo for some nature rambles.


This is really one of my favorite places in Pueblo.

Made it! I'm so out of shape, folks. I've kind of resigned myself to it, until late February/March when I intend to resume running. There just isn't enough light at this time of year, when one works from 8-5.

There was plenty of light on this holiday afternoon, though.

Adele had my adoring eye on her like the whole time, with her new Marvel dress and her Shirley Temple curls (she got foam rollers for Christmas).

Lake Pueblo is unearthly; I wish I could take every one of you there.

On Saturday, a day that was forecasted to be in the 50s and sunny, we woke up to overcast skies and icy trees. It made for a magical drive to Denver to see the cousins! Joel and Bri welcomed us warmly, fed us Indian food, and took us to the Denver Zoo! It's been a while since we've taken them to a proper big zoo, with multiple big animals and such. I'm grateful that living in Pueblo has made it possible for us to have a relationship with the Denver Cornells, whom we hadn't seen for years before our move. Adele, watching the giraffes with awe.Miles, watching the seals with delight.

These bizarre-o eels might be my favorite. They're like three inches tops, and they remind me of the souls of the mer-people that Ursula stole.

Loved this pensive pacing bear

The day was filled with attempts to photograph the whole group of kiddos. Adele's really getting comfortable with the baby sister role and ruined several photos with her insistence that everyone wait for her to get into exactly the right pose.                               We had a few good shots, however!

Mr. Lion gave us a good show!

After we left the zoo, Joel and Bri showed us another Denver treasure: Cousin Christopher’s food truck! Joel’s step-brother has moved to Denver and started a Western NY themed food truck! Complete with buffalo wings, garbage plates, and salt potatoes, all absolutely the therapy for a cold day spent outdoors. You get to eat in the nearby brewery, so of course we took advantage of that too! I told them I finally felt like I was on holiday. Thanks Joel and Bri!!

A couple more zoo photos:

School went ahead and started on the 3rd, 10th day of Christmas notwithstanding. I made one more batch of sugar roll-outs for Epiphany, though!

Well now. I’m well into January and nearly to a second semester at the middle school. If you want to know, it’s hard. It still just skins me alive to manage so many young people all day. Most days it takes more patience than I have. I could fill your ear with opinions about the shortcomings of education in America, but I’ll leave it at this: our classes are too big. 30-32 11 and 12 year olds is too many in a small room. It feels almost like my first year all over again. I have been emotionally all over the map, from internalizing my self-hatred over my lack of patience and insufficient compassion for the kids (many of whom come from heartbreaking family and economic situations), to wanting to escape and struggling to be present, to bitterness, to this stubborn determination that keeps me showing up with optimism every single day. 

Ultimately, I do see this as a huge opportunity to not only learn to be the kind of teacher that can really bless my students, but also to grow as a person. I am finding more and more that there IS a gap between stimulus and response, that you can notice that gap and expand it and be so present in that gap that you can truly choose your response to even a very provoking situation. I am returning to my prayers. 

In the evenings, I walk Koopa under a sky that’s now a little lighter every night, and I sometimes escape into podcasts, sometimes pour out my day to the sky, sometimes just enjoy the quiet and the complete lack of anyone needing anything from me. One night, I saw an owl!

My #oneword for 2018 is open. I think I always need to remember the joy and freedom that comes from openness to the moment one is in. Anxiety wants you to preserve your safety by remaining closed off: to new experiences, to others, to the present moment. This year will probably demand new kinds of openness; every day at school already requires it. 

In good news: Jon has submitted a draft of his dissertation to his committee!! This is a huge milestone for us; pray for smooth sailing through the revision process! He got an assistantship so we wouldn’t have to pay tuition this semester, but who knows about summer! We’re hoping it’ll be all finished by then.

(Finally a little bit of snow has come today, to make it feel a little bit like January. It may amount to half an inch.)

And whither then? We cannot say.

(We are on the second to last chapter of The Return of the King! 15 months later)

A Pageant of Many Voices

New haircut + curlers for Christmas!

We hit everyone with the Nativity Pageant at 9am, 4th Sunday of Advent, and Christmas Eve to boot.                                                             Above, the cue cards I ended up making for Mary, the one cast member who couldn't seem to memorize her lines. Below, the cast waits patiently for their turn to preach the gospel to the congregation!
                             This year, I decided that if I was going to be directing the pageant for the second year in a row, I was also going to write the script. Over Thanksgiving, I banged out what I thought should be in the pageant: a prophecy from Isaiah, references to Jesus' family's poverty and obscurity within the Empire, a visit from Elizabeth, portions of the Magnificat and absolutely no Magi. Those are Epiphany characters, for one thing, and for another, there are never enough children to fill all those roles at our little church. So we stuck with Luke 1 & 2.  Here is the text, if you're a big nerd and you're interested. ;-)

How often do you get to have a selfie with an angel?

 

                           Adele's first line was, "Hail favored one!" She recited all three of her multi-sentence lines perfectly! Miles' several lines were likewise flawless. The only cast member who ended up needing support, in fact, was Mary, and the cue cards did do the trick perfectly.
                                                            Every year at Christmas, I have some moment of perfect happiness. Sometimes, it's more than one. Often, this happens at the late night service on Christmas Eve, or it might occur while making cookies or while caroling or while reading A Christmas Carol. This year, the pageant was it; that whole service was bliss. I just gazed at Mary, at her sweet and solemn and uncertain face, at the Christ Child (beloved childhood doll of the narrator, Myracle), at the frolicking sheep and swaying angels, and at the delighted smiles on the congregation's faces, and felt that it doesn't get any better on this earth. You can never hold on to that kind of happiness; all you can do is notice it when it comes and remember it when it's moved on. You can make yourself feel anything, which is a lesson I've been a long time in learning. But you had better notice what you feel, especially if what you feel is this kind of awe and joy.                                  

She didn't want to put the baby down.

                                   I have been to four services, including a very joyful one today, Christmas Day, and the "midnight" (10:00) service at which the choir sang fit to burst the rafters, but nothing has equalled this one. I told the kids before we started, "you guys are preaching today. You are the sermon. Your job is to tell everyone the good news today, so make sure you show them with your faces and your bodies that it's good news!" and they delivered. I put a calypso "Mary's Boy Child" at the end and with a lot of encouragement, I got them to dance around some while they sang. Even the sheep capered around really blithely.

Below is our video. You can see my hand gestures to the kids sometimes, and hear my leading their songs, but you can also hear everyone, and you can see most of them, too. Enjoy! if you're of a mind.

                                                                       

Today, Christmas Day, I am tired. That late service got me home late, and the kids decided at 4:30 that Christmas was starting (the first year they've tried something like this! how exasperating), so we're pretty feeble. The gifts are opened; the piano gave me the most satisfaction, while Adele is captivated by her mini doll-house and Miles can't wait to ride his bike. Jon's got new slippers and fun new clothes and is working on setting up the Firestick (taking the place of our busted Roku). Currently, they're playing Lord of the Rings Lego for Wii while the Pozole simmers. The cat is sleeping off his first catnip high, and Koopa is working on his bone. It's good to have made it to the pyjama and non-stop eating part of the holiday. I don't intend to stir until at least the 27th. 

Merry Christmas. I mean that in the least Trumpian way possible. Merry Christmas, right down to your bones, and God bless us all, every one.